


If I Quit

by ezzawrites



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, BadBoy!Blaine, Drug Addiction, Hurt/Comfort, Klaine, M/M, pls leave comments it'll make my day omg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:55:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29987346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ezzawrites/pseuds/ezzawrites
Summary: Blaine is a struggling addict who has little hope in himself, until he meets Kurt through pure chance. They have an immediate connection, but for an addict, a sudden loving relationship isn't easy to commit to. Will Kurt be worth it?
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	If I Quit

**Author's Note:**

> hi! :D this is my first ever fic i think, so i really appreciate compliments but also constructive criticism. tw, there is one use of homophobic language in this chapter and of course drug abuse is gonna be a frequent theme in this fic. let me know what you guys think, this fic is pretty personal to me and i dont know i feel yet about sharing it but i hope u enjoy reading <3 - ezza

Kurt grumbled as he trudged through the bustling halls of McKinley, his face clearly displaying his disgust. He had a deeply rooted hatred for school and mostly everyone who attended, apart from a few expectations.

“Is that another new jacket, Kurt?” a familiar voice called out from behind him. He turned around swiftly and beamed as he was greeted with a similar grin from his best friend, Mercedes Jones. Finally, someone he didn’t despise.

“Maybe…but so what? I was in need of some retail therapy.” Kurt rolled his eyes at Mercedes as they arrived at his locker.

“It sure is pretty.” Mercedes admitted, running her fingers up and down the leather sleeve of the jacket as Kurt grabbed some books from his locker and giggled at her. 

Mercedes began gossiping about some lost cause who had recently returned to school after a couple months in rehab, but Kurt was too busy focusing on the sneers directed his way from the opposite side of the hall. A large group of footballers were mocking Kurt, looking him up and down and laughing amongst themselves. His cheeks burned a deep red as he slowly hid behind Mercedes and bit his tongue, adamant he wouldn’t say anything and cause trouble between him and the bullies. However, it was too late. One of the tallest boys was heading in his direction, smirking to himself as he spotted Kurt’s pathetic attempt to escape any drama.

“Hey Hummel, this your girlfriend?” the ignorant guy spoke, his dark eyes scanning over Mercedes and then focusing on Kurt.

Mercedes lips were sealed tightly, and she opted to turn her back on the football player, instead choosing to help Kurt carry his books. In an attempt to ignore and remove themselves from the situation, Kurt snatched Mercedes hand and practically dragged her down the hall.

“Not so fast, fag.” And with that snide comment, Kurt was thrown to the ground, left winded from the smack against his chest. Struggling to get up, large hands were wrapped around him and his new jacket was quickly ripped off. He swore to himself as he watched the homophobic asshole dart down the hallway with the stolen coat.

“Are you kidding me??” Kurt sighed and began to run after him, dodging judgemental friend groups and aggravated teachers as he caught up with the bigot. His whole body ached by the time his bully slowed down, chucking his jacket into the girl’s bathroom carelessly and grinning nastily at Kurt. 

“Go get it then, lady.” The boy spat at Kurt and shoved him through the door before hurrying off. Kurt let out a deep sigh as his lip quivered.

It was barely 9am and his day was already ruined: along with his new jacket which was coated in dust and a watery liquid that was all over the girl’s bathroom floor. He shuddered a little as he retrieved his jacket from the ground. A slight cough arose from the far end stool. It was deep and perplexed Kurt as he was certain a sound so low couldn’t have came from a girl. Instead of leaving and heading to his first lesson of the day, Kurt felt obligated to approach the stall, his curiosity taking control. He could make out the toes of a pair of worn-out, cool blue vans underneath the door and he smiled slightly remembering he had the same exact pair at home, but his were far cleaner and more well-kept. Their legs seemed to be shaking as the shoes rattled against the door and Kurt hesitated to open it; he didn’t want to disturb anyone. He decided to open the door slowly and take a few steps back just in case. Surprised it wasn’t locked, the door swung open with ease and revealed a small, dark-haired boy slumped down in the corner. Freezing, Kurt’s body tensed, and he gripped the door desperately. Kurt was so taken aback that there was another boy in the girl’s restroom, that at first, he didn’t notice the needle the boy was clutching. 

“I- “Kurt stumbled over his words, his eyes darting back and forth from the needle to the boy’s innocent, angular face “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to…” his face flushed a hot red immediately.  
Kurt couldn’t help but stare at the circular scars dotted up and down the boy’s left arm. The marks were a deep purple and Kurt’s heart sank from the realisation. The boy was still huddled up in the corner quietly, processing the intensity of the situation.

“I thought I was the only guy to dare step foot in the girl’s bathroom.” he finally muttered, pulling down his sleeve sheepishly, his cheeks rosy and pink with shame.  
Kurt blushed too at the sound of the boy’s voice. It was smooth and golden like honey, a delicate sound that instantly blessed Kurt’s ears. He watched the boy for a moment, admiring him. Dark, shaggy, brown curls sat messily on top of his head, inches away from covering his eyes. His eyes were pools of sweet hazel-green and when they met Kurt’s own striking blue eyes, his heart spun a little. Yet, an intensity lay beneath them, an intensity that desired the tightness of a belt, preparing for countless injections.

“Do you- I mean, would you like some- Um, is there anything I can do to help?” Kurt fumbled with his choice of words; he couldn’t focus when the metal of the syringe glistened underneath the bright lights above them.

The boy simply shook his head and continued to stare at Kurt with his beautiful yet gloomy eyes. He began shoving everything into a black backpack and gave Kurt a small nod before standing up. He wobbled slightly and reached for his head, as his whole body drooped sadly. High-pitched giggles interrupted the silence between the two boys and without thinking, Kurt slammed the stall door shut. With worry painted on his face, the boy shuffled towards Kurt, his eyes blinking rapidly. Kurt motioned for him to stay quiet, he could not be caught like this. How would he explain himself? The boy began tapping his foot with nerves and Kurt bit his lip anxiously and rested his foot on top of the other boy’s – any noise could direct a girl towards the back stall. 

They stood silent, the unknown boy still gazing curiously at Kurt. He’s probably just in shock, Kurt told himself, even though the unexpected looks from another boy made his stomach knot with hope. After what seemed like hours, the giddiness of the girls drifted out of the bathroom. For some reason, Kurt was reluctant to open the stall door and let this boy go. He peered over at his foot, which was still on top of his, and then lifted his head to glance into the boy’s eyes one more time. He stared at him, he was twiddling his thumbs shyly and coughed a little. Kurt had never met anyone so timid. 

Apprehensively, Kurt held out his hand and gave the boy an understanding smile. 

“Kurt,” he spoke, anticipating for the boy to take his hand “that’s my name I mean”.

He watched the boy scratch at his thumbs, deep in thought, before gently taking Kurt’s hand.

“My name’s Blaine.” he uttered, locking eye contact with Kurt again. Kurt could have sworn he was looking up at him lovingly on purpose.

The touch of Blaine’s hand against his was delicate, familiar even. In that moment, his eyes sinking into this mysterious boy’s angelic features, he could have forgotten about what he had seen. Forgotten all about _the needle, the scars, the fear_. He could have felt a connection, a reason to discover more. Lost in thought, Kurt hadn’t noticed Blaine slip out of the stall and float away like a distant memory.

* * *

Blaine rose his head slightly, his eyes dusted with sleep. Instantly, he embraced the cool shudder that shot through his veiny arm; it was comforting to sense the liquid exploring his body. The overwhelming nosiness of his classmates irritated Blaine, he’d always preferred softer, lower sounds. Although the day had just begun, he was already determined to get home, to be alone - away from everyone and everything. Blaine sunk deeper into his chair, his stomach churning and growling as he reflected on the encounter he’d had in the bathroom only minutes ago. It made him incredibly uneasy remembering how polite and accepting Kurt had been after uncovering the mess in the bathroom, how he’d gazed at him almost acceptingly. God, Blaine thought, he knew how much it meant to him when someone didn’t immediately scream insults and threats when they found out about his addiction. He somewhat resented the sudden change in reaction, wished Kurt had reacted the way everyone else did, just so he could stop thinking: Thinking about Kurt and his charming sapphire eyes that focused on him open-heartedly. 

His daydreams grew more and more sporadic as the drugs welling up inside him dragged him down, suffocating him in thoughts so intrusive he failed to focus on anything his teacher was projecting to the class. Blaine knew school was defeating him already, and he hated feeling so weak. Sighing, he glanced at the cuts and grazes carved into his knuckles, emotions and memories crumbling away in his mind slowly. The blaring ring of the bell startled Blaine, but he froze in his seat as Kurt wandered through desks, his chiselled face peaceful as he chatted with a friend. Blaine’s own face lit up as he watched Kurt leave; he’d been so obsessed with his thoughts, he hadn’t even realised he and Kurt were in the same class. The smile dotted on Blaine’s face immediately fell as he remembered the encounter in the bathroom, what Kurt had witnessed, what Kurt could be telling his friend. Hastily, Blaine clasped a shaky hand onto the strap of his backpack and dashed out of the classroom, kicking over untucked stools in the process. His pupils widened as he scanned hopelessly around the corridor, in search of Kurt. The drugs swelled up, demanding control, pushing Blaine down into a sense of panic. He gripped the edge of a locker desperately as the sensation of the liquid inside him crept up his arm slyly. Then, ahead of him, he noticed Kurt spying on his every move nosily. Their eyes met as Kurt continued to gossip with his friend, making Blaine increasingly fearful; he knew Kurt would have told someone, he had no reason to keep it to himself. Kurt’s face became alarmed as Blaine darted erratically towards him, clinging to every locker he passed.

“Kurt, what are you doing?” The words sprang out of him, his tone unexpectedly cruel.

The unnerved touch stayed fixed on Kurt’s face as he responded, “Uh…I’m talking to Mercedes, why?”

Mercedes shot Blaine an irritated look, her eyes crawling up and down him as he quickly grasped Kurt’s shoulder.

“Well actually, I need to talk to you…right now.” He mirrored Mercedes aggravated expression and she huffed and walked away with her nose pointed high.

Kurt’s eyes followed Mercedes before she disappeared down the hall, and then he faced Blaine, his eyebrows raised anxiously. 

“Is there something wrong?” he spoke quietly, blushing slightly at the tightness of Blaine's grip on his shoulder.

“You’ve told people, haven’t you? About me, about what you saw?” His words spilled out of his mouth manically, his heart thumping against his chest so loud he was worried Kurt could hear.

A flash of utter hurt glassed over Kurt’s eyes, his head dropping to end the eye contact. Blaine’s hand fell from his shoulder, and he twiddled his thumbs nervously. Maybe he’d overstepped, jumped to conclusions. The look on Kurt’s face was unreadable, but it wasn’t menacing or full of revenge like Blaine had suspected. Maybe the world wasn’t completely against him.

“You really think I’d do something like that?” His voice was merely a whisper as he stepped away from Blaine shyly.

“I’ve known you for five minutes, so yes, I did think you would do that to me.” Blaine’s words were harsh but truthful, but he still shuddered as Kurt received them, his eyes glued to this floor.

“Well, I guess that’s the first thing you should know about me…I keep secrets.” And before Blaine could decide on a sarcastic response, Kurt had blended in with the crowd of students shuffling down the hallway.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! ill be posting the second chapter as soon as possible :)


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